My Princess Boy

Do you know a little boy who loves to dress up in girls’ clothes or play with dolls? Seattleite Cheryl Kilodavis wrote the wonderful book My Princess Boy to encourage children and adults to love and appreciate little boys like her son Dyson.

 

Although she initially discouraged his interest in all things princess-related, Kilodavis is now a national speaker on gender expression. It all started when she went to pick up Dyson at daycare one day, and he ran up to her joyously wearing… a red dress with pink heels. This Primetime Nightline video tells their story.

 

Emily Emerson read My Princess Boy aloud to us at a staff meeting recently, holding the book to show us the whimsical illustrations by local Suzanne DeSimone.  “If you see a princess boy, will you love him for who he is?” she asked. Few us of were dry eyed at the end of the story.

 

We know that not many parents or caregivers allow boys to dress in pink or wear tutus past their toddler years. And I can sympathize with this decision – children who are different can suffer from horrific bullying from their peers, which can lead to suicide. In afterschool, we have a huge opportunity to provide social and emotional support for all youth, when schools are so focused on academic outcomes (which are incredibly important). We can help create safe spaces where kids don’t need protection from others, but can be themselves.

School’s Out coach Tracy Flynn has a deep expertise on topics of inclusion and is offering little or no cost training or consulting through June 2012. Tracy, Regional Consultant for the Welcoming Schools Project, of the Human Rights Campaign Foundation, provides a comprehensive approach to creating safe and welcoming elementary schools and child care centers that are LGBT inclusive. Contact Tracy for more information, training and technical support.

 

Tracy and Emily Emerson will host a workshop on March 16 on Building a Gay/Straight Alliance. Emily has worked in the youth development, violence prevention and sexuality education fields as an educator, trainer and program manager.

• The Make it Better Project started by the Gay-Straight Alliance Network in response to the It Gets Better Project. They suggest concrete steps for youth and adults to improve lives now from disrupting bullying to advocating for campus policies.
• Read the blog of another mom whose little boy went as Daphne from Scooby Doo for Halloween. 

Other Thoughts

• Not all afterschool programs are ready for My Princess Boy. How do we develop culturally appropriate materials? On a basic level, we need to create safe environments that do not allow violence.
• After I watched the Primetime Nightline video of Dyson and his mom, an add popped up with an old tattooed biker yelling, “Do you have the stones to ride?" Just in case I wasn't sure what a real man looks like, leave it to online ads to remind me. Sheesh. (Also, the hyperlink for the video includes the word "transgender." According to his mom, Dyson states pretty clearly that he is a boy.)